Dealing With A Workplace Bully

According to the National Institute of Safety and Health, one out of every four employees (twenty-five percent) suffer from peer to peer bullying in the workplace.

Dina Beach Lynch, a Boston Massachusetts specialist in workplace conflict management says, “Workplace bullies can destroy a company from within. Employers need to quickly and skillfully manage bullying before it escalates into complaints and harassment charges.”

Workplace bullies lack the interpersonal and communication skills to genuinely connect with other people. They don’t know how to be persuasive.

Workplace bullies are typically fearful of loss and believe that the person they terrorize is the cause of that loss.

Instead of dealing directly with these fears, the bully resorts to using power plays- intimidation, isolation, or gossip to control the person they see at fault and defend against the perceived loss.

Are you dealing with a workplace bully where you work? Here are some of the more common examples of bully behavior:

• A bully working on a team may control others with threats of reporting up to ensure that she doesn’t lose face with her boss for not completing a project on time.
• A bully who thought he or she should have been team leader may aggressively challenge every decision and idea by the leader as a way of regaining self-esteem and demonstrating how much more effective his leadership would have been.
• A bully who is a fellow worker may malign or belittle coworkers, spreads rumors, or takes credit for colleagues’ ideas.
• A bully may deliberately ignore a member of their unit, may whisper or giggle at the approach of a colleague, or collect highly personal information and then launch a smear campaign.

Lynch says that unless management takes note of such behavior and intervenes quickly, then the only resort other employees see is to file for harassment charges and allege that the conduct has created a hostile work environment.

“Such dire legal actions can be avoided,” she says, “if management establishes and maintains clear and concise policies, keeps the doors of communications open, and takes appropriate conflict management action whenever the need arises.”

“The first critical step is the most difficult action for most top managers,” Lynch points out. “The’ve got to admit it that it is happening.”

The second crucial step is to not blame the victim. Bullying is unacceptable and you need to confront the bully. However, confronting the bully can be extremely difficult, especially when the person doing it is a boss or a supervisor.

The next key action is to confront the bully. Confronting the bully may be difficult, but it is often the best way to deal with the situation. They may not know how their behavior is affecting people.

A neutral meeting with them is the best way to discuss the issue. Tell them what they are doing that is making working with them difficult. Tell them they’ve got to stop or else face a series of escalating consequences.

If no change in their behavior takes place following this, then the situation should be elevated to higher management.

Let them know what’s happened. By all means, document the incidents.

People need to be aware that there is no guarantee that these situations can turn out happily. Lynch notes that not all companies are capable of dealing with workplace bullies successfully.

Termination of the guilty and the innocent is quite common. Terminating the innocent without just cause paves the way for a wrongful termination suit. The better response is to be sensitive and offer other remedies like mediation, conflict coaching or training to build that employees skill and confidence.

However, if people present themselves honestly and honorably, then higher managers can be sympathetic and take up the issues. If you’re lucky, cooler heads may prevail and things may work out. If things don’t work out, one or more people may be forced to leave. This can be difficult, but depending on the situation, the best solution may be just to leave.

A bullying personality is extremely difficult to deal with and change. Work takes up a big part of your active life and you have to ask yourself if your job is worth the misery if you are the target of workplace bullying. Take a moment to reevaluate whether your goals, values and interests are aligned with this job, or whether you could get your interests met in a more conducive work environment.

At least you’ve tried.

Dina Beach Lynch has a background in law, and has served as a both corporate mediator and Ombudsman over the past 12 years. She is a member of the Ombudsman Association, the American Bar Association- Dispute Resolution Section, and the Northeast Human Resources Association. Currently, she runs an Ombudsman service for mid-sized service professionals. She works with architects, CPAs, business, construction and engineering, human resources, health care, and real estate companies and consultants that want to skillfully manage internal tensions and client issues. Beach Lynch lives in Boston with her husband and children. To find out more, visit her vebsite at www.workwelltogether.com.